The arms race of signals
Not all dating advice is created equal. These articles examine popular guidance from relationship coaches, influencers, and self-help authors—separating evolutionary insight from pseudoscience and marketing.
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The arms race of signals
Peacocks, the pill, and the pickup artists: how courtship signals get made, copied, and thrown away.
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Why “playing hard to get” has survived 2,000 years of dating advice
Why Ovid, The Rules, and pickup artists all say the same thing about scarcity and desire “Don’t call him back right away.” “Let him pursue you.” “Be easy to be with but hard to get.” If you’ve heard this advice, you’ve encountered an idea with a surprisingly long pedigree. “Playing…
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The gold digger: archetype, empowerment, or rooted in victimhood?
Unpacking the Gold Digger from Betty Van Deventer to 90 Day Fiancé The “gold digger” remains a potent cultural archetype—a figure, often a woman, who leverages charm, romance, or seduction to secure material advantages from a partner. This image gained traction in the early 20th century amid economic shifts and…
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Dating TV shows: today’s relationship porn
Note: This piece was originally written around 2015, during the peak of the dating TV show and the rise of relationship-focused formats like The Bachelor. A decade later, the genre has only grown more dominant—migrating heavily to streaming platforms, going global with international versions, and experimenting with new twists like…
About the author
Andrew King
Author of Costly Signals: The Evolution of Dating Advice. PhD researcher with 500+ dating guides from the 1800s to today. Why do we take romantic advice from strangers? I have answers.
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Whether you’re a journalist, podcaster, or an event organizer, I’d love to hear from you. I speak on modern dating, evolutionary psychology, and a surprising history of dating advice.
© 2026, Andrew King