Dating Advice
Not all dating advice is created equal. These articles examine popular guidance from relationship coaches, influencers, and self-help authors—separating evolutionary insight from pseudoscience and marketing.
-
Why “playing hard to get” has survived 2,000 years of dating advice
Why Ovid, The Rules, and pickup artists all say the same thing about scarcity and desire “Don’t call him back right away.” “Let him pursue you.” “Be easy to be with but hard to get.” If you’ve heard this advice, you’ve encountered an idea with a surprisingly long pedigree. “Playing…
-
10 Dating books that changed how people date (and mate)
From ancient Rome to the pickup artist era—a curated list with commentary from my research into the evolution of dating advice Essential dating books Some dating books sell millions of copies and vanish without a trace. Others reshape how an entire generation approaches romance. After a decade spent building an…
-
Valentine’s day is a fitness test (and you’re being graded)
From panic bouquets to quiet presence: how February 14th grades your mate value Every year around the middle of February, a familiar anxiety settles over men in relationships. What do I get her? Is a card enough? Are roses too predictable? According to Mintel, 52% of Valentine’s Day shoppers admit…
-
Why “Be Yourself” is the worst dating advice
This insight comes from my book Costly Signals: The Evolution of Dating Advice, where I dive deeper into how evolutionary principles can transform modern dating. The problem isn’t authenticity. It’s legibility. “Just be yourself.” It’s the most common dating advice out there, and it’s almost completely useless. Not because authenticity…
-
The quirky world of 1950s dating advice: beyond the viral laughs
A few years ago, the internet erupted with laughter over a 1958 McCall’s magazine article titled “129 Ways to Get a Husband.” Sparked by a Wisconsin woman’s Facebook post of her rummage-sale find, the list quickly went viral on platforms like Bored Panda, Psychology Today, and Reddit. Articles lampooned its…
-
3 Signs you’re getting bad dating advice
Red flags to watch for before you take anyone’s relationship guidance The dating advice industry is enormous. Books, podcasts, YouTube channels, TikTok creators, and Reddit threads—everyone has opinions about how to find love. Some of this advice is genuinely helpful. Much of it isn’t. After a decade spent researching dating…
-
Dating apps didn’t kill dating advice—they made it essential
Why the genre thrives in an era of Tinder swipes and algorithmic matches When Tinder launched in 2012, many predicted the death of dating advice books. Why read about approaching strangers or reading signals when an app delivers endless profiles to your phone? The old problems—where to find eligible singles,…
About the author
Andrew King
Author of Costly Signals: The Evolution of Dating Advice. PhD researcher with 500+ dating guides from the 1800s to today. Why do we take romantic advice from strangers? I have answers.
Work with me
Whether you’re a journalist, podcaster, or an event organizer, I’d love to hear from you. I speak on modern dating, evolutionary psychology, and the surprising history of dating advice.
© 2026, Andrew King